02/24: Beauty and practicality are not always mutually exclusive. Yes, our culture has a tendency to make people conform to its standards of what's hot and what's not. But while premium brand names and high price tags are often associated with high standards of beauty, brands attainable by the average middle-class citizen aren't necessarily inferior. If you're good at picking outfits, a trip to Forever 21 can make you look as good as a shopping spree on Rodeo Drive can for only a small fraction of the cost. And unless you're constantly surrounded by people who are blinded by brand names, you'll look beautiful to others, and feel beautiful the way you are.

The same is true about cars. Here in the increasingly wealthy San Gabriel Valley, it seems like every other car on the road is of a luxury brand. And many people feel pressured to go way beyond their means to drive something that fits the image of being well-off. Personally, I never cared too much for brand names, and my passion for exotic cars is much more appreciation and fascination than it is envy. In fact, I've never really wanted to own a luxury car, knowing that it's wiser to invest my money in things that won't become quickly outdated or depreciate like crazy. My first car was an old SUV with all kinds of problems, but I found great joy in it. I had no intention of buying a new car just for the sake of having something new. But when a golden opportunity for an upgrade came, I gladly seized it.

02/16: "It's just a car", he said, realizing that I appeared a little nervous. Yes, there are many more important things in life to worry about than cars. But as I maintained my grip on the huge rear wing, I knew that any little mistake could lead to stratospheric consequences. After all, my fingerprints were being left on a car that most people in the world will never get a chance to see, not to mention touch.

02/13: Sixteen years is a very long time. For me, it's over half the time I've been alive, and anything or anyone that has been close to me for that long is sure to have an irreplaceable spot in my heart. Over sixteen years ago, my family welcomed a pomeranian-poodle puppy into our home. We named him Ginger. Unaware of the name's rather feminine connotation at the time, we found it especially fitting because "Ging" in Chinese corresponded to the golden color of his fur. As the years passed, we also came to see that it fit perfectly with his soft and beautiful heart.

Call me biased if you will, but I believe Ginger is the cutest dog in the whole world. And some friends who have seen him before clearly agree. If you were to tell a young child to draw a picture of a cute dog, it would probably look something like him - round eyes, big ears, a curly tail, and lots of fur. Even those who dislike dogs or are afraid of them have grown to love him. Despite occasional incidents of mischief that come with just about any dog, he was extremely well-behaved, even knowing which rooms in the house he was not allowed to set foot in without any physical boundaries in place. When he wanted something, he would sit quietly, stare intensely, and look cute until somebody noticed and responded. Other than basic necessities, there was nothing he wanted more than simply to be with people he loved.

Ginger spent most of his life as a backyard dog. He was too kind to bite anyone, but was large enough and loud enough (when he wanted to be) to keep bad guys away. We would occasionally let him inside the house during severe weather or after giving him a bath. When he passed his youth, we began letting him sleep inside every night. As he grew older, he became a full-time house dog, going outside only for potty breaks or during long periods of time when no one was home. He especially loved being around Mom, who invested the most time and effort caring for him, and would follow her around the house throughout the day and sleep beside her bed at night, becoming an inseparable part of our family. There were definitely times when he broke rules (and got punished accordingly), but many of those incidents were ultimately motived by a simple desire to be as close as possible to the people he loved most.

For the most part, Ginger had always been healthy and safe, and we're thankful that he had remained healthy and safe much longer than most dogs could. But there is no escaping from the realities of old age. Several years ago, we noticed that he had lost his hearing in both ears. He celebrated his sixteenth birthday last Halloween, and around that time his strength began to diminish noticeably, with a much shorter energy span before having to rest again. His legs became increasingly weak, and there had been a few instances in which he ambitiously climed the stairs, only to lose balance halfway through and tumble back down, leading us to exercise extra caution around the house. Less than a month ago, one of his eyes became discolored. Still, despite his physical weakness, his heart was still the same - full of joy, love, and excitement, just like a puppy.

On the night of January 27th, I discovered upon returning home at night that Ginger had been missing since morning and was not yet found. Given the events of that morning, the only possibility was that he slipped outside the garage door while it was open without being noticed. I immediately left home with a flashlight for a quick search, followed by another more extensive search that lasted until the early morning hours.

The next day I broke down in tears, and Tiffany came to comfort me and keep me company. If it weren't for her help, I don't think I could have found the strength to get back up on my feet. But as soon as I did, the search continued. Signs had been put up on the communal mailboxes across the neighborhood, and local animal shelters were contacted on a regular basis. I knew that because of Ginger's old age and very weak legs, he could not wander far. And surely his golden fur would be easy to spot even from far away.

But how could Ginger not be seen by any neighbors for so many days? The only reported sighting of him was on the morning he went missing, when the old neighborhood gardener, speaking with the help of a translator, told Mom that he had seen him down our street, and even though Carol, Brandon, and Mom all searched the area exhaustively, he was nowhere to be found. Many of our neighbors have dogs that bark like crazy everytime they spot other dogs. And besides, given Ginger's age, it's highly unlikely that someone who found him would decide to keep him. Surely he would have found a warm and comfortable place outside to spend the cold nights. Given his weak senses, it's unlikely that he could have crossed any major streets.

I concluded that he must be lost in one of the heavily vegetated areas around the neighborhood, not visible from homes or sidewalks. So in addition to checking streets and driveways, I focused my search on the nearby places that, though I had lived here for over two decades, I had never once set foot in. Minutes, hours, and days passed by, and I discovered what seemed like entire worlds that I had never explored before - hills, valleys, forests, and even some manmade secrets. It brought me to a much deeper appreciation of the little details of life that too often go unnoticed even after two decades. But at the end of each search, I still returned home empty-handed.

I knew that wherever Ginger was, he couldn't survive out there for long without proper care, especially after several cold nights and a morning shower. The chances of finding him alive were quickly diminishing with each new day. Mom had suggested that given the small likelihood that he would be found alive, it might be better to simply remember him the way we last saw him - weak, but still full of love. So each time I searched, I prayed and tried my best to surrender the outcome to God. If finding him in his current condition could be beneficial, then surely God would help make the search a success. Surely he had to be nearby. But if so, then surely he should have been found already. There's really only one possibility - Perhaps Ginger's decision to leave home was not accidental.

On the night Ginger disappeared, Mom, with tears falling from her eyes, commented on how many people's dogs, including those of people we know, seemed to have a special way of, well, saying goodbye. Even when taking their final breaths, knowing that their time had come, they can communicate a clear message of love and loyalty. In Ginger's case, perhaps he knew it was time for him to close his eyes and fall asleep one last time, and purposely chose to leave so we wouldn't have to see him suffer.

I knew that Mom's words were wise, but I refused to believe them. Day after day, I continued searching, believing that the only way I could feel like I'd done my best was to not give up hope. The free afternoon hours gained from working part-time gave me plenty of time to not only search, but also think. There were several ways that I felt like both Ginger and I had been greatly wronged, and while I made it clear from the beginning that I would not carry any unforgiveness knowing that doing so would have no benefit, my discontent continued to grow. As the days passed, unhappiness led to frustration, frustration led to anger, and anger led to hopeless insanity, which eventually led to some stupid decisions with enormous consequences. Looking back now, I'm thankful things didn't end up as bad as they potentially could have been, though at the time I really didn't care. There's definitely a huge mess that needs to be cleaned up, but I'm glad that the much greater mess in my mind and heart that caused it all has already been made right.

Mom mentioned that in the days prior to Ginger's disappearance, he had been making unusual attempts to slip outside as she grabbed the newspaper from the driveway. Given his old age, not to mention the fact that he spent most of his time asleep and unaware of his surroundings even when people were right next to him, the chances of him wandering outside the garage door by accident were very slim. And even if he found himself locked out, chances are he would stay by the house and scratch the nearest door, hoping to be noticed and brought back inside. It's still hard for me to wrap my head around how an old dog could just suddenly vanish. But over two weeks have passed without any sign of him, and while I hate to give up hope, I've come to accept the fact that maybe Mom was right after all - Ginger's disappearance was his own choice, the remarkable closing act of a lifetime of love.

Being at home without Ginger will take a long time to get used to. I still remember Mom bringing him to pick me up from junior high. Over the past sixteen years, I had interacted with him almost every day, aside from the weeks I spent living in college dorms and the occasional weekend getaways, all of which would only make him even more excited upon my return. The truth is that as we watched Ginger get older and weaker, everyone in our family knew that his time would eventually come sooner or later. All we wished and prayed for was that when it came, he would go peacefully and without suffering. It hurts to know that the time had come so suddenly and without a last hug or proper goodbye. We may never know the full story, but perhaps that's the way it's meant to be.

March on, Ging, with all the strength you have used to bless our family. Fly on, Ging, to a far better place for you, even if it means being forever asleep. Surely you knew about something or somewhere that I didn't. Maybe you had to bear far more pain that you wanted us to know about. But whatever suffering you had to go through, it's all over now. And so I'm happy for you. I couldn't have asked for a better sixteen years spent with you, and you will forever be cherished and remembered.

01/26: Clay Music 10th Anniversary Concert

A good indication that I haven't been performing music as often as I should be is that as of last saturday morning before the Clay Music concert at night, my stage notes from Jeevo's House of Blues show last April were still taped to my keyboard. Sure, performance may not be my primary focus in music. But having opportunities to rehearse and perform allows me to spend time interacting with fellow musicians and have a blast while doing so. Saturday's Clay Music performance served as both an album release concert and a special 10th anniversary event. And as a participant of Clay Music concerts since the very beginning, I see it also as an opportunity to look back at the musical journey that has brought me where I am today.

I believe it's no coincidence that my aunt started Clay Music right around the same time I considered majoring in music at UCLA. The debut album was recorded by professional musicians, and playing in the live concerts meant that I had to learn all the professionally recorded keyboard parts, helping me improve my own technique. Our concerts opened the doors for me to meet other musicians and grow not only in my own performance but also in working as a team to produce good music together. Up to that point, I was no stranger to being a student performer at piano recitals or playing keyboard during church worship services. But through my involvement with Clay Music, I came to see myself, for the first time, as a professional musician.

And little did I know how the years that followed would shape me as a musician. I switched my major to music, graduated with a degree in composition, and wrote pieces for chamber and orchestral groups. With a flexible schedule as a private academic tutor, I participated in several international tours with Clay Music to Taiwan and China, enjoying the exciting lifestyle of a traveling musician. As my life shifted to working in an office and being in a dating relationship, I began doing arrangement projects for Clay Music, which began as adding small parts to finished songs and eventually grew to four full arrangements on the latest album. Even though all these years I had not considered music as a viable career path, I was always blessed with opportunities to continue growing in various aspects of my God-given gifts.

Again, I confidently believe that my involvement with Clay Music was, and still is, no coincidence, as it has always been a mutually beneficial relationship. Surely God knew all along the challenges I would face as a introvert in an extrovert-dominated business and provided countless opportunities through the group for me to grow and make my creations heard across the world. Most importantly, the primary focus of our concerts has always been to share the gospel, and over the years I developed a clear understanding that my music, regardless of what setting it's created for, should always serve the ultimate purpose of giving God glory. Even amidst the excitement of big shows and tours, we always took time to pray and focus our hearts on God rather than ourselves. And it is with that mindset that I have been praying for God to show me how to further exercise the gifts He has given me in the near future.

Seeing myself as a professional musician is by no means an excuse to settle and stop growing. Just about every interaction I have with other musicians and their works leaves me no doubt that I have an incredibly large amount of room to improve. And I believe that's the way it always will be. And if God has helped me grow so much and in so many ways in these past ten years as one who enjoyed music as little more than a hobby, then how much more will He help me grow as I actively pursue professional career and ministry opportunities as a musician! I confess that sometimes it's easy for me to dismiss my involvement with Clay Music as something insignificant, simply because I'm a family member. But how else could I have gained so much of the knowledge, experience, motivation, and passion that is so crucial to my life as a musician today? Surely it was God's blessing all along, and surely God will continue to bless my musical pursuits, as well as Clay Music's ministry, according to His will and in His perfect timing.

01/24: As much as we humans like to think we're better than all other species of animals, we can't help but find ourselves sharing our resources with them every once in a while, whether it's a spider in the air duct or a squirrel in the backyard. For the most part, we let them go on with their lives as we go on with ours. But when an animal's presence is a potential threat to our well-being, our choices usually boil down to only either eviction or execution.

Thankfully, some potentially threatening animals aren't all that intelligent, saving me the trouble of casting any judgment. Earlier today I was moving the trash cans inside the gate when I sensed that something by the garage door was looking at me. I was quite surprised by what I saw-

01/17: Talent and Responsibility

It's easy for us Christians to justify our behavior by saying we're following God's calling. Sometimes it's really a wise decision while other times we confuse the Holy Spirit with our own desires, and it's always a challenge to figure out the difference, especially when it comes to emotionally stimulating subjects such as dating and pursuing dreams and passions. I've come to understand more and more over the years that whatever I believe is God's calling should always be in line with His character and His Word. I've also learned that God's calling is part of His intended growth process for me and often involves me getting out of my comfort zone and doing things or making decisions that don't usually come easily or naturally. Ever since I first recognized God's calling for me to major in music, I did my best to pray carefully for discernment. And now that I'm going through a major turning point in my life largely driven by a desire for a music-based career path, I need that discernment more than ever before.

Earlier tonight I had dinner with a friend and fellow Christian musician during which we talked about the challenges of juggling our passions, our families, and our personal walks with God. I told him about my desire to pursue career opportunities in music while being responsible to my coming role as husband. As we shared our experiences with each other, I came to the conclusion that in situations like ours, following God's calling should, in addition to the things mentioned above, involve a healthy balance of exercising God-given talent and fulfilling God-given responsibility.

First of all, the focus is God, not us. It is God who gives us talents and helps us nurture them, and it is God who gives us responsibilities in various stages of our lives. To neglect the former would result in being a bad steward, and to neglect the latter would be clearly disobedience. Of course, the specifics of how to balance talent and responsibility are not black and white and may vary among different people and different life stages, given that the focus remains first and foremost on God. But by the time my friend and I finished our dinner, we both agreed that this way of thinking is a good indicator of whether or not what we pursue is in line with God's will.

After much time spent praying and seeking God over the years, I am confident that it was God who brought Tiffany and I together and guided us in the direction of marriage. I'm also confident, as I was in college, that it was God who called me to major in music despite my initial hesitation. God doesn't make mistakes, and if neither of those things are mistakes, than surely there must be a way to fulfill both callings while giving Him glory. There have been times when I was so caught up in pursuing my musical passions that I lost sight of my God-given responsibilities, and there have been times when I was so focused on being responsible to the people I care about that I lost sight of my God-given talents and passion. But having spent the past several months considering the way God has orchestrated each step of my life, I now believe that there must be a way to balance my talents and my responsibilities that is glorifying to Him.

Regarding talents, I have been feeling an increasing burden that my God-given gifts are not being used to the extent that they should be. And while it's always tempting as an artist to draw excessive attention to myself, I've come to terms with the fact that I'm an introvert who finds greater joy in working behind the scenes than in putting on shows to entertain people. Whether music will be used as a career, a ministry, or both remains a mystery. But I believe that God doesn't intend for any gifts to be wasted, and when I rid myself of impure motives, He will open doors for me to put those gifts to their intended use.

And as for responsibility, I find it fascinating that my urge to exercise my musical gifts coincide with an increasing realization of my God-given role as the leader of my relationship with Tiffany. My time, money, and energy are no longer to be spent primarily on my own desires, but rather to be invested in a strong marriage relationship. That means I must remember that working on music should not occupy excessive amounts of time that take away from my responsibilities. That also means that I must be open-minded about the harsh financial realities of the music industry. Chances are that, until God blesses me with a financially stable income in music - if that's His will, I will need to pursue other career opportunities in order to fulfill a healthy balance of talents and responsibilities.

One of the great challenges of seeking God's will is to acknowledge that I'm not perfect, and that because I'll never fully comprehend God until I go to heaven, there is always room here for mistakes. I must be willing to listen to advice from others, especially those with credible wisdom, and humbly consider them even if they contradict with my own ideas. I must remember that my goal is not to use God as a means of finding a perfect path for myself, but rather to trust that there is no better path than to trust wholeheartedly in God and know that He is sovereign over every area of my life. God knows my desires, my needs, and my future, and only by trusting in Him can I find the peace of knowing I'm in the right place. And I know that when I strive to exercise my God-given talents and fulfill my God-given responsibilities in accordance with His will, He will guide me step by step wherever He leads me.

01/15: When the cloud moves, I move. When the cloud stops, I stop. I knew that submitting to God's leading would be difficult and unpredictable, but I had no idea things would look the way they do now. Long story short, I'm temporarily back to working every day in the office again. I'm not going to blabbermouth about the company or about any individuals, but after a whopping one day away from the office after my resignation, some needs came up that called for my return, which began as part-time and eventually grew to full-time for about a week. The funny thing is that when I first decided to leave the company, I was kindly offered the opportunity to remain as a part-time assistant until I find another stable source of income, but turned it down knowing that I must not allow myself to have any excuses to fall back and settle rather than pursue what's best. But now I'm back, not because I'm too scared to leave, but because I can offer a helping hand to those who have helped me so much over the years and really need it now. And for the first time, I feel like my good intentions can actually be seen and appreciated and my personal priorities and choices in life are actually being considered and respected. In a sense, this is what I've always wanted. But at the same time, I know I must stay focused on my goals without turning back. After all, my decision to resign was largely due to my inability to perform in this industry as a whole.

Over the past week and a half, I've fought many battles between my will, the circumstances I face, and how to give God glory in it all. There were a few times when I was deeply frustrated at how I had planned for so long to put my free time to good use, only to have it taken away from me again. But I eventually realized that it's ultimately not about how much free time I have, but rather how I can spend the time God gives me wisely. I can be totally gung-ho about pursuing a career in music or planning my wedding, but if God shows me a need and I push aside His prompting to help in favor of pursuing my goals, those pursuits are selfish rather than pleasing to Him. And as I strive more and more to understand what it means to seek His presence and follow His guidance, how can I expect Him to bless the things I do if I do them with selfish motives? Is He not the One who transcends all time? Is He not the One who can make some days far more productive than others, giving me the strength to accomplish what He wants me to accomplish?

As of today, I'm back to working part-time (in the morning), with afternoons free to spend on other work at home. If things go as planned, my schedule will probably be this way until around the end of the month. But I've learned that even if things don't stay this way, I need to continue to seek wisdom and take a stand for whatever God wants me to take a stand for. If He gives me no time to pursue my rightfully established goals for the near future, then I will faithfully do what He occupies my time with until He gives me time to do so. If He gives me half the day to pursue those goals, then I will put those hours, along with the money I earn working part-time, to good use. And if He gives me all day to focus on those pursuits, then I will be a faithful steward from morning till night. Wherever the cloud moves, I will follow and obey.

01/04: It's so good to be free. After four years in the office, I had basically forgotten what it's like to feel so relieved and relaxed. And looking back now, I see that, in a sense, I never really had a break in the past four years. I had never taken a day off work other than to go to court or attend retreats and other important events. I guess it simply didn't make sense to voluntarily take time off, since it would only result in a gazillion unpaid overtime hours upon returning, which would basically defeat the purpose of using vacation days. That's just how the freight forwarding industry works; even when you're away from the office, all the shipments are still moving, and somebody you communicate with in a different time zone is still working, so you always have to mentally stay on top of things. On Friday, I enjoyed a morning hike and some delicious dim sum with several church friends, during which I experienced, for the first time, what it's like to not only be away from the office on a workday, but also not have to think about anything related to work. And it leave me with no question that, for the sake of my emotional, physical, mental, and spiritual well-being, this break is really a desperately needed one.

Of course, I'm still actively looking for a new job and will not give up good opportunities to sit at home and do nothing. In fact, I have long decided that starting tomorrow, I will treat every weekday like an actual day at work, dedicating at least eight hours to various "jobs", including completing my music portfolio, looking for an apartment, and planning wedding details. In a sense, all these things are still "work". But it's work with direction, motivation, and purpose. All the resources God gives me, whether it's time or money, are to be wisely spent, and I pray to remain focused and disciplined in making the most out of the free time I now have.

01/01: It has yet to hit me that a new year has just begun. The transition from 2014 to 2015 passed by so quickly that things really don't seem all that different from the way they were just last night. Of course, most things in my life these days have already not been all that "normal" to begin with. And this is a perfect opportunity to look back at the journey that has brought me where I am now and look forward to the journey ahead of me.

When I looked back at my life at the end of 2013, I came to the conclusion that God is sovereign over all circumstances. The topic of God's sovereignty was one that I not only had many opportunities to learn about, but also came to understand in many ways at a personal level. With that in mind, I compiled a list of questions that I believed would need to be answered in the near future- "Is my current job something I see myself doing in the long run? Should I move out of home to gain the experience of living independently even with a financial sacrifice? Why do I make so many stupid mistakes? Why do I make the same mistakes over and over again? What does God want me to do with my college degree in music? When should Tiffany and I take the next step forward in our relationship?" (December 31, 2013 entry) Looking back now, I'm amazed at how most of the things addressed in those questions are exactly the things that are most pressing on my mind now.

It was a strange feeling leaving the office of Agape Shipping yesterday evening knowing that, after four years, I won't be setting foot inside those doors anymore. In May, after wrestling with my role both in the company and in the freight forwarding industry, I came to the conclusion that while I would continue working in the office faithfully, my long-term goal would be to leave and head in a different direction. In the months that followed, it became increasingly clear that my personality strengths and weaknesses made me unsuitable for this industry, and even though I hate to admit it, my frustration with being forced out of my character had a negative impact not only on myself, but also on those around me. The worsening L.A. port congestion issue, which demanded a much higher level of skill and effort from all freight forwarders, pushed me to the brink of insanity, and after a talk with my boss, we both agreed that my resignation would be beneficial both for me and for the company (December 11 entry).

I believe it's no coincidence that, ever since I opened my mind to other career paths, I began to seriously consider, for the first time in many years, what role my musical gifts would play in my life beyond a hobby. I was given several opportunities over the past year to put some of those gifts to use, including a memorable performance at the House of Blues with Jeevo (May 2 entry) and four arrangement projects on the latest Clay Music album. But I wanted to do more, and the years I spent focusing on dating, office work, and studying God's Word had led me to the conclusion that I wanted to do more not to build fame or draw attention to myself, but simply to exercise my God-given gifts, specifically the training I received in college after following His calling, and use them to give Him glory and bless others rather than letting them sit uselessly (October 5 entry). My resignation from my office job begs me to wonder if God will, in fact, bless me with a music-related career, and whether or not the time is now.

Looking back at 2014, I have no doubt that it was a year full of memories and milestones. I survived my first big earthquake in recent memory (April 2 entry). I officially left the tutoring business which had more or less been a part of my life since I was in high school (May 16 entry). I decided to turn Exotic Affinity into a YouTube partnership account, generating a small income to balance out any costs associated with the car spotting hobby. I completed my first year as a BSF group leader (May 13 entry) and proceeded with a second year in our current study of the Life of Moses. Tiffany and I enjoyed many precious memories together, including several romantic dinners and a weekend getaway in San Diego with friends. We were blessed with an opportunity to share on stage with a group of fellow young adults about how God had guided our relationship (April 27 entry). I attended several retreats, including the BSF leadership retreat that takes place once every three years (February 23 entry). But there's no question that the biggest milestone of the year took place when I decided to put a ring on Tiffany's finger and take the next big step forward in our relationship.

Tiffany and I had talked about engagement for over a year already, while there were immediate concerns in the beginning that kept us from moving forward, those concerns had passed, leaving me certain that I would have to pop the question before the end of summer. (August 10 entry). After several weeks of almost nonstop planning and preparing on top of my work schedule (August 17, 19, 27 entries), the big day came, and we enjoyed a glorious celebration of our engagement along with many of our family members and friends (September 5 entry). In the months that followed, we decided on our wedding date and selected our venues. Wedding planning proved to be both difficult and rewarding, as it brought out many of our differences but helped us learn to communicate and grow stronger through each challenge.

Being engaged definitely brings a new level of urgency to all the other pressing issues in my life regarding the future. I can't help but be fascinated by the seemingly unfortunate timing of my unemployment. To be honest, if I had left my job when I first considered doing so before summer, I would not have had the courage to propose to Tiffany. But why now, when I'm faced with the responsibilities of not only growing as a man, but also preparing to lead a marriage and future family? To many people in the world, what I did may possibly be one of the most economically stupid decisions ever. But I am confident that, in all this, God is teaching me what is probably the most important lesson to learn in preparation to lead a marriage - to trust in Him completely, regardless of what circumstances I must face. And I see that in all this, God is, without doubt, still sovereign.

I may not have all the answers to the questions I wrote a year ago. But it's not hard to see that great progress has been made, and that progress leads me to consider some more specific questions. Will I find another office job to maintain a stable income? As I work to complete my music portfolio in the near future, what new doors will God open for me to exercise the gifts He has given me? Where will Tiffany and I live when we are married? What will our wedding be like, and what will marriage be like? As we plan and prepare for the big day, how will God continue to help us grow in preparation for marriage? Only time will lead me to find the answers, but one thing I know for sure is that by this time next year, things in my life will be different in just about every way possible. And as this new year filled with uncertainties begins, I will say confidently that God is still sovereign, and He always will be. The future may be scary, but it is definitely exciting, and I look forward to all the new adventures God will lead me on in 2015.